While you were out

A kind word cupped in my hand like a wounded sparrow.
Its wing, contorted and bent like these preconceptions.
Without you, I move much too much at random.
Wondering what lies beyond those windowpanes.
Beyond the chasm that stretches in my mind.
I wonder where you’ll find me.
Dressed in my finery, like a made up lush.
Hoping for a dance.
Slathering my lips the darkest shade.
Horribly limited by my circumstance.
I count the colours that separate us now.
A warming tangerine smile that mocks and devours me.
With sharpened teeth I ready myself for the assault.
A swift attack on the loneliness that engulfs my saturated mind.
Soggy and heavy, absorbed of the dark walls that creep into my eyes.
As the scene rattles into view, I wake once more.
Peeled and unravelled, with the juice of reality staining my lips.

Quit quiet qualm

You struggle to breathe now.
With guilt filling your lungs like water.
Careful not to break.
To run a ground on regret.
Problems that seemed better in the morning.
Bare on your skin like the sun of the rising zodiac.
Crawling with your Taurus tendencies.
Your face fails to fill my eyes, contorted and hidden.
Peeping in and out of truth and reality.
Slipping into the past like an exit manoeuvre.
Weightless, like your words.
Faithless and scared.
That toe dip into the world or the righteously misled.
As the dam breaks, and the clouds sigh in sadness.
Washing me in the rain of your ghostly tears.
A phantom I left two minutes before you even knew what you were doing.
Coincidence or grand design?

Calling Elizabeth Taylor

You fill the glass up, I peer over the crystal.
My eyes violent not violet.
Travelling down the Sunset Boulevard of my mind.
To that empty house full of ghost and nothing else.
Where you left me.
In a room with everyone and no-one, forcing me to smile.
Clink. As the glasses toll my virtue.
Flash. As they captured my soul.
I’m calling up Elizabeth Taylor. Hoping to escape to another land.
Held up by Marilyn and Rita, out of reach as you try to grab my hand.
The boom of my heart vibrates my bones. The alcohol river warms the blood.
Collapsing to the floor, my health giving in like my patience.
How I’ve whispered and screamed the words ‘No Sale’.
As you bought me time and again.
Wore me like a precious gemstone. Showed me off to all your friends.
Yet it’s the diamonds of yesteryear that sparkle for me.
Raising their torches and songs to give me strength.
Everyone suffers at the top.
A fade out for Lauren, filled up once more with the words that bite.
Holding them in my heart for another battle. Another sigh.
The golden age of pedestal wobbling.
For now I see Elizabeth Taylor, walking me across the sands.
Those diamonds all a sparkle, in her eyes as she holds out her hands.

Second sight

Going towards the resolve, the 20/20 equalling something higher.
A Fissure in my memory, wraps around the stillness.
Allowing the world to hum and clatter around me now in its chaotic busyness.
Your X-rays burn through, avoiding the heart and preventing the cancer.
My realness drifts up towards you, and you cherish it all; pulling it close.
We are everything.
This blindness no longer fits me, like all of these clothes.
Swimming in ignorance makes me long for bliss.
Thank god for you. Your bones and skin, and where you walk.
Where you breathe is where I take a picture.
You heart I steal as a souvenir.
Still like the frosted birds and the rocks we climbed upon.
The sand where we walk.
Refracting in your presence, seeing your glory in my second sight.
Your cat eyes shimmer, as I count your nine lives and try to keep up.