There’s a voice in me that says you will not bend.
You will not snap, you will not end.
A hurtful pain, aimed at this heart.
Etched in stone, and miles apart.
I want to be wrong, to drink in hope.
To remain grounded, to live, to cope.
Yet all around the skies turn dark.
As nothing burns, without a spark.
And at the point where I am weakest.
You set a flame and sing ‘defeatist’.


Circles around the moon

Wake me when the world ends.
Kill the afterburners and shake me from sleep.
Wipe the dust from my interstellar eyes that have cried, huge cosmic tears.
Flooding the seas.
The dinosaurs within me perished eons ago.
Locked in tar along with childhood dreams of safety.
I staggered lonely in the skeletons of dead monsters.
Picking scales and truths from my worn down teeth.
Fossilised friendships blur past like a comet across my horizon.
Shrivelled on the vine of life, though some plucked too soon.
Dip these eyelashes in turquoise to bejewel our gaze.
Ruby up my mind with a blood of a million dead stars.
Hold a steady distance from the lunar madness.
Carving out cheese for the space monkeys.
Still on the payroll.
I spot you on the surface, with buckets of moon dust and a beckoning hand.
Initiate all power and steer my soul away.
Crying once more as the tears pop around me like bubbles.
Watching the world collapse and the memories fold away.
Locked in the lunar orbit forever.
Making circles around the moon.

Halfway there

Simple words have a lot to say.
Like the break between heartbeats.
Like waves hitting the sand.
To swim or drown in your fiery light.
You cover your eyes with intent. Stealing the beauty away.
Keep us trapped.
Keep us safe.
Locked into your skin like DNA.
Longing after life’s mystery.
Build the pyre from your bones and burn me inside out.
Collapse into your cells.
Tasting sweat and love with each gulp of air.
Here is where I want to end.

Begin the end

You wipe this across me, smearing my soul.
Reasons dipped in the oil of old.
Setting fire to what was constructed in that cathedral heart.
Burn those books.
Too many voices and words that itch your eyes.
Wonderful illuminated choices.
So many options to despise.
You crumble away our past like a mosaic mountain.
Shifting each rock with the ones you throw.
Opinions that hurt, your augmented ammunition.
Laying waste to my field of reprieve.
Never a victim of happenstance.
A martyr all the same.
Bowing to your own reflected idol, hung up in gold and wood.
Or the blue that bruises my world.
Leaving a mark of departure, etched on my skin for an eternity.

Yours to dissect

I always knew.
These epiphanies like fireworks in my head. My chemistry pulsating towards yours.
You move back, detach. Repel like the wrong end of the magnet.
You smoke your cigarette, I taste the ash in my mouth.
Feeling for your touch, needing you near. Reaching out, only to fall further.
I fall back into my blood, swimming against the current of your love.
I always knew, yet never really comprehended.
I taste your daydreams and feast on the scraps you throw me now.
Like a dog tied up outside a newsagents, waiting restlessly for you to return.
The place we first met, that memory now is haunted by feelings I cannot control.
A life made up of isolated moments, laid out on the table of a relationship.
Carve, drink and hack away at them. Vomit out what you no longer require.
The pain cracks in your bones and you cry out. Jagged little hypnotics get swallowed down.
I drift into your subconscious. Into the sleep, the pre-cursor of death.
There is no life here anymore, since you went away. Since you said you needed your freedom.
My Frankenstein creation is laid to rest. Life bad, death good.
My monster love that caused such havoc.
Sinking slowly to the bottom of the sea.